I've been thinking a lot about life and how it's really so fleeting. Over the past couple of years I haven't been the most "spiritual" of people. I had sought God out, trying to figure out where He was right in the midst of the worst moments, not feeling His presence when I was crying out to Him. To even aspire to figure out the mind of the Almighty is not something I could even fathom. His ways and His thoughts are far too complicated for me to even grasp the tiniest glimpse of most of the time.
I know He's been with me through the bad times, because His presence is very real and He's pouring out his blessings on my family. I strayed from Him, I gave up at times, but He was always there, watching out for me. I think it's like a parent and a child. Something bad happens, and you try to console your son or daughter, but they are beside themselves with emotion about what's going on and they clam up, push you aside, and no matter what you say or do, you can't make them feel better at that moment. So, being the loving parent you are, you back off a bit though you never leave. You don't push yourself on them, when they're ready to talk, to listen to your advice, to feel your love....when they're ready, they'll seek you out and you'll be there for them...just like you always have been and always will be. That's God. That's my take on it anyway, and that's what I see as happening over the past bit of time.
So, let's fast forward from then to "now". My life is busy and I don't take the time to seek out God as I should, as much I need, or as much as I desire to. But then, something happens to make you think again and re-examine where your priorities lie. Something happens to give you a whole new perspective...
My pastor recently challenged us to write some "thank yous" to a few people who have truly impacted your life and you want them to know. I wrote a
post about an amazing lady who has had a MAJOR impact on my life. (Please read it before continuing.) When I wrote that, I had heard months ago that she had cancer and only had a few months to live. I hadn't heard anything else since I was first told that. I'd asked for an email address, but didn't get one for whatever reason, so I never knew anything else. I wrote that "thank you" not sure if she'd ever know how much I appreciated her or not, but hoping at least that her husband would know. This past week, I was asked for my email address because her husband, my pastor from when I was in high school and college, wanted to contact me. I braced myself for the worst, but hoped for the best.
Here's what he said: ...forwarded a posting you placed on "My Space". Wow! Thank you so much for your kind words!! Lynn was taking chemo as I read them. I brought them over to her while she was still taking chemo. She said "obviously she was told about my condition", to which I replied, I don't think so. She said "Wow!"
Whether you know it or not, she has Ovarian Cancer and has about an 8% chance of surviving 5 years. She goes in tomorrow for a blood transfusion. Your kind words are valued and appreciated.
When you get a moment, drop us a line.
"The Cookie Monster and Diet Pepsi freak!". :-)
Every time I read that, tears come to my eyes. I'm overwhelmed by the blessing that God allowed me to experience, by letting me have the chance to let her know how much she has impacted my life. I'm also overwhelmed at being given the opportunity to hopefully help her experience a small blessing of knowing the appreciation that I have for her. And by her example, I hope to have just a small impact on the world I leave behind. As a youth pastor's wife, those are some big shoes to fill, to always be positive and leave behind a legacy of faithfulness on impressionable youth with whom I come into contact. Life hasn't been easy, and I don't want to hide that fact from anyone. The life of one who chooses to follow Christ is filled with challenges and hard times, but the triumphs outweigh those 1,000,000:1 and I'd never give up the life I've been given to do anything else. Pursuit of a high-paying career could be do-able, but I choose to work with children in an educational field. Pursuit of acquiring "stuff" could be attained, but I would never have the chance to impact others, and be the blessing that Lynn is. I'd just have a house full of stuff that will eventually be outdated or destroyed, and nothing to show for my life when it comes to eternity. So far, Lynn's impact on the world (as well as her husband's) has helped to influence me into making the choice to become (and stay) a pastor's wife. In turn, the last we heard, two of our former youth have themselves become youth pastors, one has committed to becoming a missionary or doing something of that nature for Christ, and numerous others have decided to follow Him with their lives in whatever career they choose to do, even if it's not full-time ministry.
You may never know the impact you have on those around you, but if you're lucky you'll find out just a glimpse of the possible impact your faithfulness to the Lord has made on this world. I choose to leave a legacy of following Christ, to impact young people, and to put my treasure up in Heaven. I haven't always done that in the past, but this is my desire from this point forward. With that, I'm ending with the lyrics of one of my all-time favorite songs (from my high school years), and oldie, but a goodie...
"FIND US FAITHFUL
sung by Steve Green
We're pilgrims on the journey
Of the narrow road
And those who've gone before us line the way
Cheering on the faithful, encouraging the weary
Their lives a stirring testament to God's sustaining grace
Surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses
Let us run the race not only for the prize
But as those who've gone before us
Let us leave to those behind us
The heritage of faithfulness
Passed on through godly lives
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful
May the fire of our devotion light their way
May the footprints that we leave
Lead them to believe
And the lives we live inspire them to obey
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful
After all our hopes and dreams have come and gone
And our children sift through all we've left behind
May the clues that they discover
And the memories they uncover
Become the light that leads them
To the road we each must find
Oh may all who come behind us find us faithful
