Today I stumbled across a great Lenten devo site, of course I think Jerry may have mentioned it to me, but I'd never seen it until I was looking under "favorites" in the devotions folder. It's called "Journey to the Cross" and it is a truly reflective experience if you let it be. I decided to go back and start at the beginning of the "journey" and read, prayed and reflected on all of the first week's entries...
Presence of God--When the waves threaten our lives, when the storm clouds roll in, we turn to you, O God. Hold our hands, whisper calm words to our hearts, cry with us and remind us that when we hurt, your heart cries too.
"O God, I try to appear confident, assured, and in control. I confess I am often gripped by fear. Take away my fear. You are my refuge, so give me hope, so I may face today with confidence. Enable the tragedies of life to help me reconnect to what really matters. Allow the waters of baptism to wash over me again, cleansing me from my sins and connecting me with your love. Show me my weaknesses and help me become strong. I want to build on a solid foundation. I want my life to be ready for the storms. Keep me from the temptation, the laziness, of building a life on the shifting sands. Life often seems unfair. When the waters of destruction seem to threaten my existence, help me to remember you are the God who meets us in our brokenness to help pick up the pieces. Amen"
I know that God is there, but my life seems so dry and dead right now. I don't feel I have much of a purpose, much of a future, much of a hope. I am struggling to have my hope restored. I "know" that He loves me and is taking care of me. It just seems like right now it's from a distance, like an absentee father; one who moves far away and sends the child support check whenever he feels like, one who only calls on your birthday and holidays but he forgot this year until it was past. My faith and hope is weak right now, I am to blame because I haven't been working on my end of the relationship, so that's what I'm trying to do now. Hopefully I'll be able to see improvements and have peace about everything again, or at least take steps to feel more peaceful in my life...
Benediction--Restore our fortunes, LORD, like streams in the Negev. Those who sow with tears will reap with songs of joy. Those who go out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with them. (A Psalm of Ascents)
Check it out, I think you might enjoy the devos. I am!!! http://www.journeytothecross.org/todaysdevotion/index.cfm
