The End Will Justify the Pain It Took to Get Us There...

Here are the lyrics to my newest fav RelientK song, I keep thinking about the past year every time I hear it. It's really eye-opening to me, to hear it, and how things are going to be once we "get there" (to whatever new ministry God has in store for us).

2004 was a rough year all-around for our family; from resignations, housing situations and even physical injuries we all really struggled to stay sane at times. It's been stressful and I haven't been the best wife, mother, or even child of God; I've allowed myself to be too caught up in being "so scared to find out, what this life's all about, so scared we're going to lose it, not knowing all along that's exactly what we need". I think I have been holding on to "what I 'thought' I had" way too tightly and I need to allow myself to lose the life I'm living (or think I should be living). I know that wherever God leads, we will be happy and joyful in serving in whatever ministry He leads us. Right now, there are a couple of options out there, and I have absolutely NO clue what the outcome will be, but I do know that we will be happy no matter which door we walk through because we will be following God! My stress levels will remain high until we know where we're going, and then rise again trying to move and settle, but I know that we are "almost there" and this past year has been a long journey that is nearing an end. Then, we'll start on a fresh journey and my heart feel brand new and the heavy load will be lightened!!!

"Let It All Out"

RelientK

Let it all out

get it all out

rip it out remove it

don't be alarmed

when the wound begins to bleed

cause we're so scared to find out

what this life's all about

so scared we're going to lose it

not knowing all along

that's exactly what we need

and today I will trust you with confidence

of a man who's never known defeat

but tomorrow, upon hearing what I did

I will stare at you in disbelief

oh, inconsistent me

crying out for consistency

and you said I know that this will hurt

but if I don't break your heart then things will just get worse

If the burden seems too much to bear

Remember

the end will justify the pain it took to get us there

and I'll let it be known

at times I have shown

signs of all my weakness

but somewhere in me

there is strength

and you promise me

that you believe

in time I will defeat this

cause somewhere in me

there is strength

and today I will trust you with the confidence

of a man who's never known defeat

and I'll try my best to just forget

that that man isn't me

reach out to me

make my heart brand new

every beat will be for you

for you

and I know you know

you touched my life

when you touched my heavy heart and made it light